The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Friday, November 12, 2004

News 2020

All the latest, very early

The Government is to consider whether mention of civilian casualties in war and the suffering of refugees following natural disasters is unduly traumatic for viewers of news programmes, the Department of Public Enlightenment revealed today.

Viewers' organisations and the recently privatised official monitor, Television Watching Audiences Trust, have expressed increasing concern over the effect on TV audiences of images of starving or bereaved people. Casualty figures could also be a problem, even on the frequent occasions when no actual figures are cited.

"Even if you say that no civilian casualty figures are available, you're still raising the spectre of those casualties in the public imagination," said media consultant Bradley Ichneumon. "And as for showing images of the starving when people are just settling down for a quiet evening's viewing, naturally it's a very traumatic experience for the audience."

Mr Ichneumon has also criticised the showing of programmes with text-only credits. His researches show that the absence of a voice-over can cause feelings of inferiority in the illiterate and uneducated - the very group who constitute Britain's largest and most lucrative TV market.

The BBC says it has tried to get around the problem of civilian casualty reports by embedding all its war correspondents with the attacking forces. Since embedded correspondents never see civilian casualties in the making, all that remains is the thrill of vicarious combat and the vital public information contained in the reports, said a BBC spokesperson.

But Mr Ichneumon is no longer certain that the BBC approach is enough. He is presently engaged in drawing up a report about the legal risks for broadcasters who inflict traumatic images on their viewers. The Department of Public Enlightenment says that it is awaiting Mr Ichneumon's findings with interest.

"We may need to look at legislation to protect viewers from this kind of input," said junior minister Mogadon Fleece. "Of course, we shall also need to protect the corporations against the possibility of being damaged by the lawsuits."

Under legislation thought to be scheduled for the next Parliament, broadcasting corporations would be able to offload compensation costs onto the families of those mentioned in the offending broadcasts. In the case of Third World citizens, the costs could simply be added to their countries' debt to the West. "The fairest and best solution may indeed be to outsource the compensation to the source of the problem," said Mr Fleece.

2 Comments:

  • At 11:28 pm , Blogger Raoul Djukanovic said...

    Dear Sir,
    Do you employ ventriloquists in cyberspace? If not, then how am I to account for the voice of that Welsh newsreader accompanying your opening sentence. I'm most confused now. Could there be a conspiracy? Which side do you back?
    Yours paranormally,
    Signatory Waiver

     
  • At 9:51 am , Blogger Philip said...

    If you had ever studied the media, you would know that all reputable news organisations employ ventriloquists, whose official title is usually something like "a highly-placed Government source". This helps the environment by preventing journalistic overwork, wear on recording devices and notebook wastage.

    I am not aware of writing with a Welsh accent, although given the way Blogger's fonts behave on a Mac there's no knowing what might be happening out there. I certainly do not intend to declare my allegiance in any conspiracy until I have been approached with at least one or two shady but lucrative proposals.

     

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