The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Sunday, February 06, 2005

News 2020

Five times winner of the BBC Award for Nautical Non-Destabilisation

Media power in the free world may be getting out of hand, according to a survey of student attitudes in the United States. Almost three-quarters of those interviewed expressed some dissatisfaction with the news media, often on the grounds that it abused the freedom granted it under the Homeland Constitution by criticising government policy.

The poll, commissioned by Murdoch Disney News as part of its youth marketing strategy for this year, asked almost 20,000 young people what they thought of press and TV coverage of important current events.

Most of the students were satisfied with coverage of the Commander-in-Chief and some of his dogs, although a small number observed that the press occasionally implied that certain policies were not the most efficient way of carrying out America's will. Most of the students who mentioned this criticism said it was "probably a bad thing".

Coverage of foreign policy was criticised on the grounds of "too much bad news, and too little human interest". Students thought it would be appropriate to show more pictures of soldiers consoling newly-democratised widows, and helping natives pull down statues of evil dictators.

"Although the Preventive Infotainment Act protects Americans against much world news that might alarm or depress them, matters such as potential rises in the price of petrol or coffee are occasionally considered soundbite-appropriate," said media expert Dr Bradley Ichneumon today.

"It is clear that young people today, at least in America, feel that such items contain some degree of audience demoralisation potential," Dr Ichneumon continued. "Executives at Murdoch Disney and other info-disseminatory business outlets will be thinking very carefully about these findings."

The students interviewed came from fifty different high schools located all over the United States. Asked about their political opinions, over 97% of those interviewed described their views as "moderate".

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