News 2020
Opposition condemns plague measures
As the latest epidemic of bubonic plague rages in India, forcing British tourists to cut short their holidays, the leader of the opposition has launched a virulent attack on the Government for failing to do more to stop the disease reaching Britain.
The NuLibCon Alliance leader, Boris Johnson, today accused the Government of "a totally un-British degree of complacency and self-satisfaction" and blamed the NuLabLib Coalition's "free and easy attitude to immigration" for the possibility that the epidemic might have the "potentiality to devastate British shores".
The Government has placed a blanket ban on all imports of brown rats and their fleas until the epidemic can be contained.
Today the Minister for Health Industry Deregulation, Yersinia Profitt, announced that the Government will be purchasing two million tons of Hallibechtel FrendliHelthi's Patented Plague Panacea as a "precautionary measure".
"Two million tons will be enough to treat every man, woman, child and brown rat in the United Kingdom twenty-three times over," Ms Profitt said.
However, Mr Johnson accused the Government of interfering with market forces. "The Government's artificial creation of demand for Hallibechtel FrendliHelthi's Patented Plague Panacea is simply one more instance of its crypto-socialistic refusal to allow the market to proceed in its inflexible benevolence," he said.
Mr Johnson also condemned the Government's restrictions on brown rat display and flea mobility, saying that "if the market had intended rat fleas to be less mobile, investors would be purchasing shares in rat fleas with less powerful legs".
As the latest epidemic of bubonic plague rages in India, forcing British tourists to cut short their holidays, the leader of the opposition has launched a virulent attack on the Government for failing to do more to stop the disease reaching Britain.
The NuLibCon Alliance leader, Boris Johnson, today accused the Government of "a totally un-British degree of complacency and self-satisfaction" and blamed the NuLabLib Coalition's "free and easy attitude to immigration" for the possibility that the epidemic might have the "potentiality to devastate British shores".
The Government has placed a blanket ban on all imports of brown rats and their fleas until the epidemic can be contained.
Today the Minister for Health Industry Deregulation, Yersinia Profitt, announced that the Government will be purchasing two million tons of Hallibechtel FrendliHelthi's Patented Plague Panacea as a "precautionary measure".
"Two million tons will be enough to treat every man, woman, child and brown rat in the United Kingdom twenty-three times over," Ms Profitt said.
However, Mr Johnson accused the Government of interfering with market forces. "The Government's artificial creation of demand for Hallibechtel FrendliHelthi's Patented Plague Panacea is simply one more instance of its crypto-socialistic refusal to allow the market to proceed in its inflexible benevolence," he said.
Mr Johnson also condemned the Government's restrictions on brown rat display and flea mobility, saying that "if the market had intended rat fleas to be less mobile, investors would be purchasing shares in rat fleas with less powerful legs".
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