The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

A Government Arms Dealer Writes

I was just walking along the road like, just minding my own business, and suddenly all these pacifists jumped out and started, like, harassing us and stuff, I mean, you know, doing harassment and stuff. It isn't safe to go out on the streets no more now. I mean before, right, you could do business in a civilised way, meet your customers out in the open, show them all the latest hardware, maybe machine-gun a few dairy cows for sport like, show the Indonesian minister for forcible humanitarianism a good time, British style. But now you can't even walk out your own front door without pacifists coming up to you and, like, saying stuff. Sometimes they even put stuff through your letter box or send stuff through the post like, so it gets harder and harder to keep your mind on, you know, what kind of hollow-point small-arms ammo would be exactly right for crowd control in Uzbekistan or whatever. I mean it can be really really difficult, you know, you're trying to flog an honest bomb and all the time in the back of your mind you're worried about if your wife's gone through the post and found something really nasty from a pacifist, or even a lot of pacifists, they congregate you know, they don't believe in war so they think it's safe to get together I suppose. Or if your kids are being exposed to, like, harassment at school because somebody's gone and used the Freedom of Information Act to find out your name and address and the amount of collateral damage that went with your last couple of sales. I don't think that's very democratic, myself, I mean it's not like an ID card or anything, it means your name and details, right, just going out to anyone who wants them. I mean that's not freedom, right? Not like what we're fighting for. I mean you try to tell people, right, you try to tell them that a gun is, like, only as bad as the guy holding it, and that guy could be, like, just a normal decent guy just like you and me like, so if the guy is decent the gun is decent and what could you have against selling a decent guy a decent gun, like, but they never listen. Or you try to tell them about making a living even, it's not like any of it's illegal, like, I mean I work for the Government you know, just like a nurse or a firefighter and you don't get pacifists harassing them, like, do you. And I mean like you can't go around living like a single mother on benefits or something, and if I wasn't doing it, right, somebody else would be, and maybe, right, they wouldn't even have my scruples, right, but they don't listen to that neither. I mean you do your best, serve your country and all, work hard and try and do your bit for your Ministry, what represents the best this country stands for in the world, and then all this happens. It's a bit depressing really, how they don't have any interest in your point of view like, the way they just harass you like, just come up to you on the street and harass you like...

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