Britishness: Key Traits Revealed At Last

Yet another survey has found that "together, Diana, Princess of Wales and Winston Churchill represent the best of Britishness, as seen by the British". More than seventeen thousand people were asked to choose which of various statements they imagined described themselves, e.g. "I find the world a very interesting place" and "I always let bygones be bygones". Oddly, these two statements were linked to "curiosity" and "forgiveness" respectively, rather than to the more typically human traits of xenophobia and self-righteousness.

Since nothing these days can be done without involving a celebrity, each attribute was "represented in people's minds by an individual". As one would expect, "open-mindedness" was represented by the Greatest of Great Britons, Winston Churchill; perhaps, given his views on compulsory sterilisation for the unemployed, the natural supremacy of the English-speaking peoples and the eternal preservation of the British Empire, they had in mind his flexible attitude to party loyalty. "Fairness" was represented by Princess Diana, who was at least blonde. Given such standards as these, it is perhaps not surprising that "love of learning" was linked to Richard Branson and Carol Vordeman, or "creativity" with Andrew Lloyd Webber.

Anyway, it appears that love, gratitude and kindness (Richard Littlejohn, Lord Levy and John Hutton, anyone?) were greater priorities for women than for men, and that women were "more appreciative of beauty". Men "ranked creativity higher"; as creativity was represented by Lloyd Webber and Damien Hirst, one hesitates even to speculate who might have been the icon for beauty. Both sexes gave a low ranking to "hope, vitality and persistence", which may surprise some.