Sleepers

Efficiency, economy and consumer choice are running rampant on the railways, as engineering work by Network Rail overruns for days on end while fares are hiked by three or four times the rate of inflation. This is, of course, just the thing to get people off the roads and onto less pollutive forms of transport, besides being a wonderful example of the ways in which privatisation of public services can lead to vast and profitable improvements. The Minister of Transport, Ruth Kelly, apparently has nothing to say on the matter, but her shadow, Therese Villiers, said that rail passengers had been "on the end of a real double whammy" and had been "let down badly" by New Labour's failure to overturn the policies of the last Conservative government.

Meanwhile, Network Rail has "apologised profusely" for the disruption, blaming "a shortage of specialist engineering and contractor staff". A similar tactic is in regular use on London Underground, where those in charge apparently believe that a recorded apology followed by a non-explanation followed by further delays is a cheap and amusing method of adding spice to our journeys. (They've also taken to informing us that certain messages on the PA system proceed direct from "the control room at X station", where X station is the station one happens to be in at the time; which is obviously deeply relevant to someone or other.)

The Office of Rail Regulation is launching an "urgent investigation" into the delays, and Network Rail could be fined before being allowed to proceed to the next glorious episode of efficiency, economy and consumer choice.