The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Bad Company

A member of the House of Donors, who defected from Daveybloke's Cuddly Conservatives because they didn't hate foreigners loudly enough, has invited Geert Wilders, a Dutch Muslim-baiter, into the country; Agent Smith, with her usual mix of cool-headness and political subtlety, has decreed that he "would pose a genuine, present and significantly serious threat to one of the fundamental interests of society", and has ordered that he be kept out. This comes dangerously close to slander, as a previous Minister of Unfitness for Purpose used very similar terms while playing a delightful jest upon a Muslim prisoner at the Guantánomaly. We must hope for Agent Smith's sake that the unfortunate victim does not decide to interpret an implied comparison with Geert Wilders as an instance of religious hatred.

New New Labour, whose wish to speak peace unto nations is such that it has used anti-terrorism laws against a friendly government, wants to "stop those who want to spread extremism, hatred and violent messages in our communities from coming to our country", unless they work for Rupert Murdoch or the extremism happens to be of the neoliberal, Zionist or Saudi variety. Wilders has made a film called Fitna, which is no doubt plastered all over the internet but which would threaten one of the fundamental interests of our society if it happened to be screened in the presence of Geert Wilders. The film apparently juxtaposes images of the attacks on the World Trade Centre with quotations from the Koran, thus proving in seventeen minutes that the Koran is a "fascist book". Meanwhile, Wilders' host Lord Pearson has urged the Government "to sponsor a conference into whether the Old Testament, New Testament and Qur'an contained justification for violence", or whether God was kidding.

Rather touchingly, Wilders, who has called for the Koran to be banned, invoked the right to free speech which both he and New New Labour believe should be granted only to the right people: "Even if you don't like me and don't like the things I say then you should let me in for freedom of speech. If you don't, you are looking like cowards." Fortunately for British democracy and Saudi values, looking like cowards is not an experience to which New New Labour are altogether unaccustomed.

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