The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Dogging Straw

A Libyan who was kidnapped and tortured by the Gaddafi régime, with the considerate help of British Intelligence, has begun legal proceedings against the empty suit which was the Reverend Blair's apostle to the nations at the time. The empty suit is accused of being complicit in "torture, inhuman and degrading treatment, batteries and assaults", which makes things rather more complicated than if it were a terrorist. Had the empty suit been accused of deliberately endangering British troops, other than by the humane expedient of donating their services to George W Bush, it could have been tried by newspaper before its inevitable deportation; had the empty suit been accused of endangering American troops, it would by now have disappeared into a conveniently confidential processing centre where its co-operation could be incentivised by the CIA or the Pakistani secret police. Unfortunately, the empty suit is merely accused of aiding and abetting the ill-treatment of a couple of Muslims whose abduction even Gaddafi's chum the Reverend Blair cannot quite remember; so it is quite possible that a court may be involved. Surprisingly given the empty suit's share of responsibility for the War on the Abstract Noun and its dire consequences for national security, the empty suit has not as yet been electronically tagged, hooded or placed under house arrest; although given what may come out should the matter come to an open court, it is possible that the empty suit is one of the very few suspects in the War on the Abstract Noun to be hoping for a secret trial.

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