The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Sunday, September 15, 2013

International Aid

Since the Osbornomic recovery, such as it is, will necessarily take place in the centre of the world (Westminster) and its immediate outlying regions (London and the Home Counties), it seems only fair that the rest of the country should muck in and make a contribution. Kit Malthouse, a deputy of the London Haystack and chair of the capital's promotional board, has proclaimed that Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland should throw money at London if they want to attract more tourists, because nobody comes to Britain except to see London anyway. In return, London would drop a hint or two to the tourists about toddling over to Cardiff or Belfast or Edinburgh for a bit, because a Conservative-run London would never want them to spend all their money in the one Conservative-run place. According to Kit Malthouse, this means that everybody wins; although happily the real world has obtruded itself far enough that he expects resistance from the recalcitrant Celts.

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