The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Thursday, September 04, 2014

Keeping Things Civilised

In the time-honoured fashion of law enforcement around the world, the Christian state of Oklahoma has investigated its bungled execution of Clayon Lockett in April, and has concluded that, although lessons must be learned, nobody was to blame. The main problem seems to have been with a sheet which was requested by the prison warden in order to protect Lockett's modesty while he was being killed, and to safeguard those observing the death against the sight of anything so distressing as a set of genitalia. The sheet hindered the execution squad from realising that the wheels of justice had ground to a halt, and Lockett eventually died of a heart attack more than a hundred minutes after the auto da fé began. Having made its investigation, the Christian state of Oklahoma recommends, in order to keep things constitutional, that only about an hour should elapse before the department of corrections calls the prison governor to "potentially request" that the correction be consummated on another occasion.

2 Comments:

  • At 7:06 pm , Anonymous Madame X said...

    And yet we still manage to get upset over a few beheadings. Go figure.

     
  • At 7:33 pm , Blogger Philip said...

    In fairness, some beheadings are fine - those carried out in Saudi Arabia, for example, are an entirely acceptable quirk of an ancient and glorious culture.

     

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